Family Guy Funny Quotes

Stewie Griffin: What’s this? Blueberries? Oh, oh my G…oh, that’s better than sex!
Stewie Griffin: Do these huggies make my ass look big?
Peter Griffin: I’ve got an idea – an idea so smart that my head would explode if I even began to know what I’m talking about.
Peter Griffin: Excuse me, is your refrigerator running? Because if it is, it probably runs like you – very homosexually.

Stewie Griffin: You. Fetch me my copy of the Wall Street Journal. You two, fight to the death.

Lois Griffin: Stewie why don’t you play in the other room?
Stewie Griffin: Why don’t you burn in hell?

Peter Griffin: Now kids daddy only drank so that the Statue of Liberty would take her clothes off.

Peter Griffin: I’ve had a good life. And you can always be proud of your father and all of his accomplishments.
Meg Griffin: What accomplishments?
Peter Griffin: Go to your room.

Chris Griffin: Dad, can you help me with my math homework?
Peter Griffin: Math. Math my dear boy is nothing more than the lesbian sister of biology.

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