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Hope, deceitful as it is, serves at least to lead us to the end of our lives by an agreeable route. ~François Duc de La Rochefoucauld

Once you choose hope, anything’s possible. ~Christopher Reeve

Hope is the only universal liar who never loses his reputation for veracity. ~Robert G. Ingersoll

Things which you do not hope happen more frequently than things which you do hope. ~Titus Maccius Plautus

Hope is some extraordinary spiritual grace that God gives us to control our fears, not to oust them. ~Vincent McNabb

In reality, hope is the worst of all evils, because it prolongs man’s torments. ~Friedrich Nietzsche, Human, All Too Human, 1878

When the world says, “Give up,”
Hope whispers, “Try it one more time.” ~Author Unknown

There is nothing so well known as that we should not expect something for nothing – but we all do and call it Hope. ~Edgar Howe

If you knew that hope and despair were paths to the same destination, which would you choose? ~Robert Brault

Hope itself is a species of happiness, and, perhaps, the chief happiness which this world affords; but, like all other pleasures immoderately enjoyed, the excesses of hope must be expiated by pain. ~Samuel Johnson

Hope is that thing with feathers that perches in the soul and sings the tune without the words and never stops… at all. ~Emily Dickinson

Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. ~Anne Lamott

All it takes is one bloom of hope to make a spiritual garden. ~Terri Guillemets

The miserable have no other medicine
But only hope. ~William Shakespeare, Measure for Measure

The road that is built in hope is more pleasant to the traveler than the road built in despair, even though they both lead to the same destination. ~Marian Zimmer Bradley

You’ve gotta have hope. Without hope life is meaningless. Without hope life is meaning less and less. ~ Author Unknown

Hope is the feeling we have that the feeling we have is not permanent. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic’s Notebook, 1960

Lord save us all from… a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms. ~Mark Twain

Hope is faith holding out its hand in the dark. ~George Iles

When hope is hungry, everything feeds it. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic’s Notebook, 1960

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Just once it might be instructive to pretend you’re accepting an award for failure, just to see who you would thank. ~Robert Brault

In a world flagrant with the failures of civilization, what is there particularly immortal about our own? ~G.K. Chesterton

They say President Wilson has blundered. Perhaps he has, but I notice he usually blunders forward. ~Thomas Edison

There are defeats more triumphant than victories. ~Michel de Montaigne

Failure sometimes enlarges the spirit. You have to fall back upon humanity and God. ~Charles Horton Cooley

Notice the difference between what happens when a man says to himself, “I have failed three times,” and what happens when he says, “I am a failure.” ~S.I. Hayakawa

A failure is a man who has blundered, but is not able to cash in the experience. ~Elbert Hubbard

No man is a failure who is enjoying life. ~William Feather

Failure is only the opportunity to begin again more intelligently. ~Henry Ford

Because a fellow has failed once or twice or a dozen times, you don’t want to set him down as a failure till he’s dead or loses his courage. ~George Horace Lorimer

You can’t have any successes unless you can accept failure. ~George Cukor

There is no failure. Only feedback. ~Robert Allen

Failure changes for the better, success for the worse. ~Lucius Annaeus Seneca

There is much to be said for failure. It is more interesting than success. ~Max Beerbohm, Mainly on the Air, 1946

You always pass failure on your way to success. ~Mickey Rooney

Nothing fails like success because we don’t learn from it. We learn only from failure. ~Kenneth Boudling

Our business in life is not to succeed, but to continue to fail in good spirits. ~Robert Louis Stevenson

It is a mistake to suppose that people succeed through success; they often succeed through failures. ~Author Unknown

The men who try to do something and fail are infinitely better than those who try to do nothing and succeed. ~Lloyd Jones

What’s your favorite? :D

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Funny Life Quotes

“The road to success is always under construction.”

“A bargain is something you can’t use at a price you can’t resist.” – Franklin P. Jones

“I totally take back all those times I didn’t want to nap when I was younger.”

“Tell someone there are 300 billion stars in the universe and they’ll believe you. Tell them a bench has wet paint on it and they’ll have to touch it to be sure.” – Murphy’s Law

“If you think something small can’t make a difference, try going to sleep with a mosquito in the room.”

“The only time a windshield wiper will work properly is when it’s holding a parking ticket.”

“How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear or understand a word they said?”

“How is it that one match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box of matches to start a campfire?” – Christy Whitehead

“I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I’m not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.” – Robert McCloskey

“The next time you think you’re perfect, try walking on water.”

“Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.”

“Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey – but I’d bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.”

“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?”

“Bad decisions make good stories.”

“How is it that our memory is good enough to retain the least triviality that happens to us, and yet not good enough to recollect how often we have told it to the same person?” – François Duc de La Rochefoucauld

“I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.”

“People who snore always fall asleep first.”

“The trouble with, “A place for everything and everything in its place” is that there’s always more everything than places.” – Robert Brault

“No one is listening until you pass gas.”

“Life was so much easier when your clothes didn’t match and boys had cooties!”

“You’ve reached middle age when all you exercise is caution.”

This is you list of Funny Life Quotes. Can you tell us who was your favorite? Although, if you got another funny quote that is not on the list, please tell.

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2. The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up. – Mark Twain

3. Happiness is excitement that has found a settling down place. But there is always a little corner that keeps flapping around. – E.L. Konigsburg

4. Man is fond of counting his troubles, but he does not count his joys. If he counted them up as he ought to, he would see that every lot has enough happiness provided for it. – Fyodor Dostoevsky

5. You must first be who you really are, then do what you need to do, in order to have what you want. – Margaret Young

6. This is my “depressed stance”. When you’re depressed, it makes a lot of difference how you stand. The worst thing you can do is straighten up and hold your head high because then you’ll start to feel better. If you’re going to get any joy out of being depressed, you’ve go to stand like this. – Charlie Brown

7. Happiness is not a goal; it is a by-product. – Eleanor Roosevelt

8. Jumping for joy is good exercise. – Unknown

9. One joy scatters a hundred griefs. – Chinese proverb

10. My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy your ice cream while it’s on your plate. – Thornton Wilder

11. Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things. – Robert Brault

12. Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony. – Mahatma Gandhi

13. All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them. – Walt Disney

14. The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. – Eleanor Roosevelt

15. Every now and then go away and have a little relaxation. To remain constantly at work will diminish your judgment. Go some distance away, because work will be in perspective and a lack of harmony is more readily seen. – Leonardo DaVinci

16. The path involves respect for all small and subtle things. Learn to recognize the right moment to strike the necessary attitudes. – Manual of the Warrior of Light

17. I say “Out” to every negative thought that comes to my mind. No person, place, or thing has any power over me, for I am the only thinker in my mind. I create my own reality and everyone in it. – Louise Hay

18. The thing that is really hard and really amazing is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself. – Anna Quindlen

19. I am woman! I am invincible! I am pooped! – Unknown

20. If you’re going through hell, keep going. – Winston Churchill

21. Your problem is you’re too busy holding onto your unworthiness. – Ram Dass

22. Trust your gut. – Barbara Walters

23. Action is the antidote to despair. – Joan Baez

24. She took the leap and built her wings on the way down. – Unknown

25. You have brains in your head and feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You’re on your own and you know what you know. And you are the one who’ll decide where to go. – Dr. Seuss

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- “There is nothing more galling to angry people than the coolness of those on whom they wish to vent their spleen.” – Alexandre Dumas

- “Life is too short to hold a grudge, also too long.” – Robert Brault

- “He who angers you conquers you.” – Elizabeth Kenny

- “For every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness.” – Unknown

- “Anger is one letter short of danger.” – Unknown

- “Anger ventilated often hurries toward forgiveness; and concealed often hardens into revenge.” – Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton

- “People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing.” – Will Rogers

- “Never write a letter while you are angry.” – Chinese Proverb

- “Get mad, then get over it.” – Colin Powell

- “The world needs anger. The world often continues to allow evil because it isn’t angry enough.” – Bede Jarrett

- “Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.” – Phyllis Diller, Phyllis Diller’s Housekeeping Hints, 1966

- “In certain trying circumstances, urgent circumstances, desperate circumstances, profanity furnishes a relief denied even to prayer.” – Mark Twain

- “Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” – Malachy McCourt

- “Take no revenge that you have not pondered beneath a starry sky, or on a canyon overlook, or to the lapping of waves and the mewing of a distant gull.” – Robert Brault

- “If you kick a stone in anger, you’ll hurt your own foot.” – Korean Proverb

- “Not the fastest horse can catch a word spoken in anger.” – Chinese Proverb

- “Anger dwells only in the bosom of fools.” – Albert Einstein

- “No man can think clearly when his fists are clenched.” – George Jean Nathan

- “Anger is short-lived madness.” – Horace

- “Anger and jealousy can no more bear to lose sight of their objects than love.” – George Eliot

- “Do not teach your children never to be angry; teach them how to be angry.” – Lyman Abbott

- “Anger blows out the lamp of the mind.” – Robert G. Ingersoll

- “Sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.” – Unknown

- “Next time you’re mad, try dancing out your anger.” – Sweetpea Tyler

- “Spite is never lonely; envy always tags along.” – Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic’s Notebook, 1960

- “Always write angry letters to your enemies. Never mail them.” – James Fallows

- “At the core of all anger is a need that is not being fulfilled.” – Marshall B. Rosenberg

- “Anger and folly walk cheek by jole.” – Benjamin Franklin

- “Temper tantrums, however fun they may be to throw, rarely solve whatever problem is causing them.” – Lemony Snicket

- “I don’t have to attend every argument I’m invited to.” – Unknown

- “Can anger survive without his hypocrisy?” – Jareb Teague

- “Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” – Buddha

- “Malice drinks one-half of its own poison.” – Seneca

- “Anger is a killing thing: it kills the man who angers, for each rage leaves him less than he had been before – it takes something from him.” – Louis L’Armour

- “Never strike your wife – even with a flower.” – Hindu Proverb

- “Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.” – Ambrose Bierce

- “When angry, count four; when very angry, swear.” – Mark Twain, Pudd’nhead Wilson, 1894

- “Anger is a bad counselor.” – French Proverb

- “Resentment is an extremely bitter diet, and eventually poisonous. I have no desire to make my own toxins.” – Neil Kinnock

- “The worst-tempered people I’ve ever met were people who knew they were wrong.” – Wilson Mizner

- “To carry a grudge is like being stung to death by one bee.” – William H. Walton

- “The best remedy for a short temper is a long walk.” – Jacqueline Schiff

- “When a man sends you an impudent letter, sit right down and give it back to him with interest ten times compounded, and then throw both letters in the wastebasket.” – Elbert Hubbard

- “Consider how much more you often suffer from your anger and grief, than from those very things for which you are angry and grieved.” – Marcus Antonius

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- “Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.” – Scott Adams

- “Painting is just another way of keeping a diary.” – Pablo Picasso

- “Art is the only way to run away without leaving home.” – Twyla Tharp

- “The aim of every artist is to arrest motion, which is life, by artificial means and hold it fixed so that a hundred years later, when a stranger looks at it, it moves again since it is life.” – William Faulkner

- “Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once we grow up.” – Pablo Picasso

- “Life beats down and crushes the soul and art reminds you that you have one.” – Stella Adler

- “Painting is silent poetry.” – Plutarch

- “Painting is poetry that is seen rather than felt, and poetry is painting that is felt rather than seen.” – Leonardo da Vinci

- “It has been said that art is a tryst, for in the joy of it maker and beholder meet.” – Kojiro Tomita

- “Art is the desire of a man to express himself, to record the reactions of his personality to the world he lives in.” – Amy Lowell

- “To send light into the darkness of men’s hearts – such is the duty of the artist.” – Schumann

- “We all know that Art is not truth. Art is a lie that makes us realize truth, at least the truth that is given us to understand. The artist must know the manner whereby to convince others of the truthfulness of his lies.” – Pablo Picasso

- “I don’t paint things. I only paint the difference between things.” – Henri Matisse

- “The artist uses the talent he has, wishing he had more talent. The talent uses the artist it has, wishing it had more artist.” – Robert Brault

- “An artist cannot fail; it is a success to be one.” – Charles Horton Cooley

- “Every creator painfully experiences the chasm between his inner vision and its ultimate expression.” – Isaac Bashevis Singer

- “To make us feel small in the right way is a function of art; men can only make us feel small in the wrong way.” – E.M. Forster, Two Cheers for Democracy, 1951

- “Art is the stored honey of the human soul, gathered on wings of misery and travail.” – Theodore Dreiser

- “The artist’s world is limitless. It can be found anywhere, far from where he lives or a few feet away. It is always on his doorstep.” – Paul Strand

- “All art requires courage.” – Anne Tucker

- “Every portrait that is painted with feeling is a portrait of the artist, not of the sitter.” – Oscar Wilde

- “Painting is easy when you don’t know how, but very difficult when you do.” – Edgar Degas

- “It is a mistake for a sculptor or a painter to speak or write very often about his job. It releases tension needed for his work.” – Henry Moore

- “Pictures must not be too picturesque.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

- “Art is a collaboration between God and the artist, and the less the artist does the better.” – André Gide

- “Anyone who says you can’t see a thought simply doesn’t know art.” – Wynetka Ann Reynolds

- “But that’s what being an artist is – feeling crummy before everyone else feels crummy.” – The New Yorker

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The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking places. ~Author Unknown

When the world says, “Give up,”
Hope whispers, “Try it one more time.”
~Author Unknown

Don’t be afraid to give your best to what seemingly are small jobs. Every time you conquer one it makes you that much stronger. If you do the little jobs well, the big ones will tend to take care of themselves. ~Dale Carnegie

Nobody trips over mountains. It is the small pebble that causes you to stumble. Pass all the pebbles in your path and you will find you have crossed the mountain. ~Author Unknown

When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. ~Franklin D. Roosevelt

Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there. ~Josh Billings

The greatest oak was once a little nut who held its ground. ~Author Unknown

Fall seven times, stand up eight. ~Japanese Proverb

Perseverance is the hard work you do after you get tired of doing the hard work you already did. ~Newt Gingrich

If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up and begin again. ~Flavia Weedn, Flavia and the Dream Maker

He conquers who endures. ~Persius

Stubbornly persist, and you will find that the limits of your stubbornness go well beyond the stubbornness of your limits. ~Robert Brault

You can’t go through life quitting everything. If you’re going to achieve anything, you’ve got to stick with something. ~From the television show Family Matters

I frequently-regularly-often trip while reaching for my high ideals. Then I giggle, or cry, and get back up. ~Erika Harris

The race is not always to the swift, but to those who keep on running. ~Author Unknown

It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer. ~Albert Einstein

Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after another. ~Walter Elliott, The Spiritual Life

People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and, if they can’t find them, make them. ~G.B. Shaw, Mrs. Warren’s Profession, 1893

There is no telling how many miles you will have to run while chasing a dream. ~Author Unknown

Perseverance… keeps honor bright: to have done, is to hang quite out of fashion, like a rusty nail in monumental mockery. ~William Shakespeare

The drops of rain make a hole in the stone not by violence but by oft falling. ~Lucretius

But the moment you turn a corner you see another straight stretch ahead and there comes some further challenge to your ambition. ~Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

Don’t be discouraged. It’s often the last key in the bunch that opens the lock. ~Author Unknown

The great majority of men are bundles of beginnings. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Saints are sinners who kept on going. ~Robert Louis Stevenson

If we are facing in the right direction, all we have to do is keep on walking. ~Buddhist Saying

I may not be there yet, but I’m closer than I was yesterday. ~Author Unknown

Keep on going, and the chances are that you will stumble on something, perhaps when you are least expecting it. I never heard of anyone ever stumbling on something sitting down. ~Charles F. Kettering

One may go a long way after one is tired. ~French Proverb

Never think that God’s delays are God’s denials. Hold on; hold fast; hold out. Patience is genius. ~Georges-Louis Leclerc

Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines. ~Robert Schuller

Vitality shows in not only the ability to persist but the ability to start over. ~F. Scott Fitzgerald

With ordinary talent and extraordinary perseverance, all things are attainable. ~Thomas Foxwell Buxton

As a means to success, determination has this advantage over talent – that it does not have to be recognized by others. ~Robert Brault

When your dreams turn to dust, vacuum. ~Author Unknown

Most people never run far enough on their first wind to find out they’ve got a second. ~William James

Difficult things take a long time, impossible things a little longer. ~André A. Jackson

Don’t let the fear of the time it will take to accomplish something stand in the way of your doing it. The time will pass anyway; we might just as well put that passing time to the best possible use. ~Earl Nightingale

A door opens to me. I go in and am faced with a hundred closed doors. ~Antonio Porchia, Voces, 1943

Success seems to be largely a matter of hanging on after others have let go. ~William Feather

Big shots are only little shots who keep shooting. ~Christopher Morley

Look at a stone cutter hammering away at his rock, perhaps a hundred times without as much as a crack showing in it. Yet at the hundred-and-first blow it will split in two, and I know it was not the last blow that did it, but all that had gone before. ~Jacob A. Riis

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